All for Batteries
by PRUSSIAisAWESOMER
Summary: Elliot needs batteries.  Then he gets sidetracked.


**Welcome. Uh… I wrote this some time ago, and never posted it. **

**Uh… I don't know WHAT I was listening to when I wrote this. **

**But I recommend you listen to the same thing. Whatever it was, it was quite inspirational. **

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><p><strong>And so, Elliot appears...<strong>

They had just gotten a new TV. It was beautiful. It was a Plasma HDTV.

Now...  
>Blood was conveniently out negotiating with Mar- Er, Gowland- so Elliot had it all to himself. He picked up the remote-control, and hit the power button. Nothing. After about fifty tries, he had an emotional break down.<p>

"I'm not a rabbit… I'm not a stupid one either… Stupid remote! WHY DO YOU MOCK ME? YOU. You-you… AGH."

He had no clue what to do... Until it hit him...

He should put batteries in the phone so he could ask Blood about the remote.  
>After searching every drawer, cabinet, nook, and every cranny in the mansion, there were no batteries to be found.<br>_I__wonder__if__there's__a__battery__store__near__here..._ Thought Elliot.  
>Elliot quickly marched back downstairs to the phone, and punched in Blood's number. The Hatter finally answered.<br>"Hey... Blood?" He nervously scratched the back of his head, before getting a, "Mm..?"  
>He continued, "Well... I was wonderin' if there was a battery store around here."<br>Blood thought a moment before telling Elliot, "Yes. I believe there is one..."  
>"What's the number?"<br>Blood gave him the number, before hanging up without any farewells.  
>Elliot quickly dialed the number to the store.<br>He listened to classy music for a long while… It was true bliss.  
>Finally, someone picked up.<br>"Welcome to the Rabbit's Battery Store. How can I help you? Make this quick... I have some Stalking-of-Alice to attend to."  
>Completely creeped out, and insulted, he balanced the choices of hanging up, asking who they were, or telling them that HE. WASN'T. A RABBIT.<br>Deciding, he said, "Do you have batteries shaped like carrots?" in a British accent.  
>"Indeed."<br>"I'll order two of those." He continued his accent  
>"Right. Territory?"<br>"Uh... The Hatter Mansion."  
>"Address?"<br>"Hatter Mansion."  
>"Address?"<br>"Hatter Mansion."  
>This continued for a while before the clerk finally said, "Alright. On the way."<br>Elliot hung up, and decided to wait. He wrote down a list:  
>1. Get batteries<br>2. Put in phone  
>3. Call Blood<br>4. Ask for batteries to put in remote  
>5. Put batteries in remote<br>6. Turn TV on

He quickly read his list over.

He realized something was wrong... Very wrong. Oh!  
>6. Eat carrot popcorn while watching iCarly.<p>

_Perfect~_  
>He stuck the sticky note to his pocket, before heading outside. The guy never said when they would arrive, so he probably had a few days. Besides, they could be all the way in another country.<p>

Maybe, he could visit the town vegetable stand… Visit a rabbit farm? Maybe donate carrots to the poor? Maybe find out what was so awesome about that forest Blood didn't allow them in… Nah.

He decided to go straight for the veggie market.

IT. WAS. BIG. Elliot easily got lost searching for the best vegetable ever. There were so many vegetables…

"Excuse me, sir, but where are the carrots?"

"Eh? Oh. Hello, good sir! Why, the orange things are over there!"

"Oh. Thanks. And, by the way, I'm not a rabbit." Elliot said, already headed for the 'Orange Things'.

"A hare then!"

Elliot immediately stopped in his tracks. Eyebrow twitching, veins about to pop, he turned around.

"I, 'Good Sir', AM. NOT. A RABBIT."

Many faceless stopped to watch the crazed rabbit-man.

"I said 'Hare'."

"I AM NOT A HARE or A HAIR."

"Ahm… Alright. Have a lovely day."

With that, the faceless wandered off.

Elliot muttered a quick, "Sorry," before wandering off to the 'Orange Things' stand.

There they were. The most magical things in the world. In every world, that is. The prettiest things ever. The icing to ever carrot cake. The whip cream to ever carrot Sunday. The magic to every wand. The Carrot.

He could make so many things out of The Carrot:

Carrot Compote, Carrot Ice cream, Carrot Cake, Carrot Gardens, Carrot Farms, Carrot Cupcakes, and many more things.

He got roasted carrots, fried carrots, regular carrots, rotten carrots, old carrots, shiny carrots, ugly carrots, pretty carrots, and more carrots.

As he was heading home from the market, he spotted a rabbit farm.

He headed towards it, and he could already smell the nice rabbit odor emanating from inside. He took a huge whiff, and realized… He was home.

Immediately going inside, he spotted all types of rabbits… From albino rabbits, to brown hares with purple-ish eyes.

He fell in love with both, at first sight. So, he bought both.

"I'll name you Pee-Whee, and you, Elli-Ma." He held the urge back to glomp the poor rabbits.

"Sir, you have to buy those…"

"DO I?"

"Y-y-yes… Elliot-Sama…" Said the poor faceless woman.

He eyed her for a moment, before looking back at the rabbits.

"Bye Pee-Chan. Elli-Chan." He smiled sadly at the woman before walking slowly past her.

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><p><strong>Ahem. I wrote this a WHILE back, and was too lazy to post it.<strong>

**So, lets get a few things straight…**

**I DO know that the phone was working when he… needed to put batteries in it, or something. **

**Yes, this is very OOC. And very stupid, for that matter. **

**I may not be posting anything more to this, sadly. **

**I will see.**

**Next, I HATE iCarly. I just wanted to put something stupid for Elliot to do.**

**Lastly… um… YEAH. **

**REVIEW.****:)**


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